Being obese isn't easy
by Pricat
Summary: On a day at the beach some mortals make fun of Shrek's weight and Fiona's as well causing her to go on a fad diet. Will it work?
1. Haters

Being obese ain't easy

It was a romantic day in the realm of Duloc. Shrek and Fiona were preparing for their anniversary. They were going to the beach and just sun bathe, surf board and proclaim their love physically. Fiona awoke to the smell of eggs frying on a grill. Being with someone you truly love just makes the days sweeter. But there was one tiny hitch. Donkey was still hanging around and the possibility of him following them was high. "How are we going to stop him from following us? He's going to wreck our day of romance, kissing and relaxing at the beach. Puss then showed up. For some reason, he was in a good mood.

"Hola Senor!" he said to Shrek. "I need you to do something for me!" Shrek whispered to him. "Si senor. What is it?" he told him. "I need you to distract Donkey so we can leave for our anniversary. If we don't go now, everything will be ruined!" he said. Puss understood and nodded. "It'll be a pleasure to do this!" he said evilly. He then went into the swamp house. Fiona then walked over to him. He then put a blind fold over her eyes. "I've got a romantic present for you but you've got to wait until we get where we're going!" he told her. They then climbed into the onion carriage and set off. He hoped she'd like this. He knew he couldn't give her much in the world but he wanted to try. "Maybe I can give her something she wants but I don't know how!" he thought as the carriage pulled up at the beach. He then brought out a pinic basket. It was filled with all kinds of things including weedrat stew and bottles of champagne.

He then guided Fiona out of the carriage and to a spot on the beach where they could be alone. "Can I take off the blind fold yet?" Fiona asked him. "Yes!" he said as he undid it. She was amazed. They were shaded by palm trees and the sand was warm behind their toes, the ocean was sparkling blue. "It's beautiful! I love you!" she said as they drank some champagne and kissed. They were in the middle of their romantic day when they heard sounds of disgust. They turned around and saw a couple of mortals sun bathing. "I can't believe she likes someone with a beer belly! It's like a bean bag!" one said to them. Shrek felt ashamed and hid behind a huge rock. Fiona then felt anger rise through her body. She was mad that some people were dissing them but mainly her husband. "What gives you the right to say stuff like that especially to my husband?" she asked them as she punched one of them in the stomach.

"How come someone who used to be attractive end up like you? It's a good thing you're with someone like him because nobody would ever have the nerve to date you! They'd probably leave you in the tower." Another one said to her as they left laughing their heads off about this. Tears stung her eyes. How can people like that be so cruel? But of course to them, beauty is everything and ugliness isn't. Shrek could hear her crying and this angered him. He hated it when people mocked others just because they looked or acted different. He then came out from behind the rock. Fiona was asleep on the sand. Her face was tear soaked from dry tears. "It'll be okay. Those guys are only interested in outer beauty but inner beauty is the new in!" he whispered into her ear/

He then carried her sleeping form into the carriage and shut the door. They then set off for their swamp home. But in his head the mortal's words were echoing in his mind like a thunder storm. Later on that evening Fiona was in bed but Shrek was in the bathroom shaving when he cut his hand by accident. He cursed in Ogrese but it felt good like some of the pain was disappearing. He did it to his other hand anda couple of fingers. The good feeling returned. "I'd better cover this up beforeanyone finds out what I'm doing." He said as he put bandages on them to stop the bleeding. He then climbed into bed and fell asleep. The next morning he was cooking breakfast. He found Fiona looking at a magazine full of skinny people. This worried him. "Do you want some eggs?" he asked her quietly. "No thanks honey." She told him. In her eyes was a look of sadness. "Would you like it if I dropped a couple of dress sizes?" she asked him. "I guess so. Just don't change too much, okay?" he told her as he touched her cheek gently.

He was uaware of her plans. During the next couple of weeks she hadn't eaten a single thing except for some salad and the effects were scaring him. She was tired all the time as well as being cranky. She still was pretty active but slightly tired. Puss had noticed that over the next couple of weeks that Shrek had bandages on his hands all the time. He knew what he was doing and needed to talk to him soon before he lost a really good friend. But that night Shrek came home and found Donkey running around panicking and freaking out. "What's wrong?" he asked him. "It's Fiona!" he managed to get out. This filled him with terror. He ran into the bed room and found Fiona on the floor. She was out cold. He then checked for a pulse. There was one but it was very weak. He then carried Fiona in his arms to the hospital in worry. He realised that her not eating had done it and this frightened him.

Apparently she'd been followimg something called the "New You" diet which means you stop eating lots of food but it's banned in a lot of kingdoms because many women ended up in the emergency room. He was very nervous but after a couple of hours , Fiona woke up in hospital. She was very weak and sore at the minute. "I need to tell you something!" she said to Shrek. "Yes?" he asked her. "I've been following this diet which phases out all foods. It's called the "New You diet! I did it because of what happened at the beach. I thought you'd be happier if I lost a ton of body weight." She said to him. Tears then flowed in his brown eyes. "I've something to tell you as well!" he said silently as he undid the bandages on his hands. Fiona gasped inshock at the scars on his hands. "I did it becauseI felt unhappy with my current weight as well but I couldn't fight the sadness so this was the only way." He told her. He then felt her touch his hands gently. "It's okay. Those idiots don't understand how much their words can damage somebody or hurt them." She said to him as he left.

He then thought about that as he went to the bar but then he saw those guys from the beach hassling someone else. He went to see what was going on. They were picking on Doris the bar tender. He could see tears welling up in her eyes. This was the last straw. "LEAVE HER ALONE!" he roared at them as he helped her onto her feet. The pack of guys backed away slowly. He then pinned one of them to the wall. "Because of you, my wife's in the hospital because of your jeering. I won't let you make someone else miserable just because you think it's fun!" he said angrilyas he let the guy go. The guys then ran off screaming. Doris smiled at this. "Is what they did true?" she asked him. "Aye. They wrecked our day at the beach and put mywife in hospital. It just makes me angry to see my friends or family hurt by people like them." He told her as he left.

He then fell asleep lonely but the next morning Fiona had came home. He told her about what had happened at the bar. She Was angry but relieved.


	2. From Bad to Worse

Being obese ain't easy 

You want to be known

You want to be heard

But know you are beauitful.

You have so much to give

Some change you want to live.

So shout it out

Let yourself know..

Make some Noise- Hannah Montana.

Ch 2

Fiona was feeling lousy. She still remembered that day at the beach and what those guys had said to her. She was sitting up in bed reading Medieval Woman and looking at the skinny people in the photos. Tears stung her eyes at this as her husband came in carrying some breakfast and juice. "Hey honey what's wrong?" he asked her gently as he set the stuff on the bedside table. "It's… just I'm not beautiful like the women in this magazine." She told him sadly. He then looked at them. "Honey you are beautiful. Besides these women are posers and Photo shopped so that they look this way. They're probably like this as well but they hide it using digital imagery to make them look hot." He told her.

She smiled sadly at him. "Thanks for that but I feel that I can't be myself until I change my body size." She said quietly. He left the room feeling sorry for her. But a few hours later, he heard sounds of throwing up come from the outhouse and was worried. "_Please don't let it be Fiona doing that. She could cause herself major pain throwing up. I need to help her before she goes too far with this body stuff." _He thought as he watched through the outhouse window saddened to find Fiona clearing up her own bowels on the floor. Shrek was getting seriously freaked. His own True Love was going through an appearance crisis at the moment and he didn't know what to do. He then got into the carriage and drove off to Far, Far Away. "Maybe Mom will have some advice to help me." He told himself. But Fiona had gone into town and went to the chemist's to get something that could help. She then came out a few minutes later with a paper bag. Inside was a yiny bottle of diet pills. "These should work. I don't want to puke up a lung or something so this might work out. Plus Shrek doesn't have to know." She thought as she took some and drank some water.

The onion carriage then pulled up at the castle at Far, Far Away in late afternoon. Lillian was sitting in the gardens sipping tea but was surprised to see her son in law show up. Harold wondered what was going on too. "What's wrong?" she said seeing the look in his brown eyes. "It's Fiona. A few days ago we were at the neach when some mortals came and made fun of us especially Fiona. After that, she's been obessing over changing her body shape. She just got out of hospital after following the New You diet and this morning, she was throwing up in the bath room. I'm worried for her in case she does something dangerous and hurts herself. That's why I came here. To get advice to help her before it's… too late." He explained grimly. Lillian understood how her daughter must be feeling.

"I don't know how to help son. I'm sorry." She told him sadly. He felt more confused when he came home that night and entered the bed room. Fiona was lying on the bed but she wasn't breathing normally. This was scaring him deeply. He then carried her to Casualty but in her dress pocket he found something. It was the bottle the diet pills were in. This shocked him greatly. Tears fell down his eyes as she lay there in a hospital bed with an oxygen mask on her face. He then saw somebody approach him. It was a woman with brown hair, green eyes and wore a white coat. "I'm sorry for her. She like other woman go through mental problems like worrying about their body size. I think the media is to blame. I'm Aisha Williams a psychologist. Let's just say I'm going to try and help her through this mental turmoil." She told him. "What do you mean? My wife's not insane, is she that you have to take her away from me?" he asked her. She laughed at that. "No she's not insane! I'm just going to try and do some therapy to help her see that inner beauty is more important than what magazines depict." She explained as she walked off.

Later he returned home but wasn'y able to sleep. He wanted to help her but couldn't and it hurt him to see Fiona in any pain. Puss noticed that something was up with their friend but didn't want to ask. He noticed that their friend spent all his time with Fiona at the hospital. He then crept into the bedroom one night upon hearing Shrek sob quietly to himself as he climbed onto the bed beside him. He was worried. He'd never seen him cry before. "What's wrong senor?" he whispered to him. "It's my fault, all my fault if I lose her because she's not breathing properly and I should've stayed to help her. That way she'd never have taken those pills and she wouldn't be in this damn mess." he said in his sleep. Puss felt sorry for him. "It's not your dault. If you had stayed, she would've taken them anyway. You know how stubborn she can get. Maybe she'll get better and this mess can be solved before it gets too serious." he said to him.

He watched as he fell asleep exhausted from venting his anger but didn't want to leave the room. He knew the boss didn't tdeal with sadness very well and knew what could happen if he left him in this state of mind...

A/N. This chapter is is for Ladystarflower80 because like me and Fiona, she knows what it's like to feel unhappy because you're a bit bigger and seeing skinny people makes us sad. I wanna thank her for reviewing this. Also I chose a few lyrics from Verse 2 of Make some noise because it suits how Fiona's feeling at the moment in this fic.


	3. What's Going on?

Shrek woke up feeling more miserable than ever. He got up and got dressed but sighed as he walked into the living room. Puss and Donkey watched as he sat at the table quietly just eating silently. "Hey senor how're you feeling?" Puss asked him gently. Donkey wondered if their friend was still worried about Fiona. "Not very good. I was dreaming about Fiona. I need to see her to know she's okay." He said to them sadly with silent tears in his eyes as he got up and went outside.

He then went to the hospital. Fiona was still asleep with the life support machine on. "_Please wake up. I miss you. Every night without ya is agony. I feel like it's my fault this happened. You're the thing in this world that matters the world to me." _He thought as he held her hand. Suddenly he heard shallow breathing as he let his mind wander. "S-Shrek is that you? I missed you too." She whispered to him. He smiled at her. He then saw Aisha come over to them. "Ah I see she's awoken. It must've taken something special to do it." She said to them. "Who's this?" Fiona asked weakly. " She's a therapist who helps people who have problems with their body image deal with their mental turmoil." Shrek told her. She smiled at her as she fell asleep again. He sighed as he left the hospital.

Puss then saw him come home happy. "I wonder what happened to change his mood." He thought as he saw him come in. "What's up?" Donkey asked. "Fiona came around. She woke up when I visited her earlier. I hope Aisha can help her get over her problem." He told them. Later he visited his wife at the hospital. She seemed more calmer than before. "Hey honey how're you feeling?" he asked her. " A bit better. Aisha's been helping me refind what I lost. I messed up everything, didn't I?" she told him. Tears were running down her face at that. He then wrapped his arms around her. "No you haven't. You're just going through a rough time at the moment but I know you can make it and be the one I know and count on." He told her as he kissed her. Aisha then came over to her.

"You're lucky to have a husband like him. I used to be depressed because I used to be a little chunky but my husband hated it. He said I had to lose weight or he'd leave me. I tried diet pills but they didn't help but throwing up down a toilet did so I kept doing it until I ended up in hospital. I spent a lot of time with a therapist discovering I could be myself and not care what others thought." She told her. Fiona thought about that as she fell asleep. But something very bad was happening in Far, Far Away and Duloc. A cloud of magical energy swept through both kingdoms and changing the people, making them think that vanity was more important than being themselves. Charming laughed evilly as it vanished. Shrek felt weird as he went back into the house. But Puss could feel that something wasn't right.

Later that day Fiona was out shopping in Duloc with her True Love but other people were looking at her angrily and she saw hate and shallowness in their eyes when she'd done nothing to them. She then saw Snow White and her princess girl friends and went over to them. " Hey guys what's up? I see you're doing some shopping." She said to them. " Girls why is this ugly, fat loser talking to us for?" Snow said coldly. " Why're you being so colder than usual Snow? Don't you remember? We're friends?" she asked them. " Friends with you? Don't make me laugh. You used to be cool and one of us until we found out your little secret. Now you're a loser and a fat ogress." Cinderella told her as they laughed at her. But then Shrek joined in the laughter. " You're right. She's nothing but an ugly, over weight wench. Let's go." He said to them. Fiona watched as they walked off.

Tears stung her eyes at this as she went back to the swamp. Puss saw her walk past him into her and her husband's room and followed her. " What is wrong senora?" he asked gently. " It's just I was out shopping with my True Love and we got some amazing bargains. Then I saw my princess friends and I was talking to them but they seemed cold and like they became shallow and said hurtful things. But as they laughed at me, my husband joined in and called me an ugly wench." She told him.

He watched as she fell asleep from crying and left the room. " I knew something wasn't right. It had to do with that strange cloud that covered the kingdom yesterday. I'm going to find out!" he thought as he walked out of the house and into the forest…


	4. Girl on a Mission

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 4

Fiona wondered what was going on with everybody especially her husband. Charming laughed at her pain. He watched as he glowed with magic. "Yes I have everybody's inner beauty!" he yelled proudly. But somebody had seen this and had snuck out of Charming's lair. He went to the swamp. He knew that Fiona was the only one who could help him seeing as she hadn't had her inner beauty stolen by Charming. He followed her to the swamp.

"Who's there?" she asked worried. The stranger then made himself known. "Relax Fiona I won't hurt you. I know what's been going on. Charming cast a spell on both kingdoms making everybody shallow and uncaring about inner beauty especially your friends and your husband. It hurts, doesn't it? But you can help them. The spell can be broken by pure inner beauty from a true hearted person." He explained to her gently. "So that's why they were acting like jerks! They're just under a spell. But why tell me this? Who're you?" she said to him. He nodded as he took off the cloak hiding himself and revealed his identity. "I'm your husband's cousin Snowgre. He and I sort of… drifted apart. The reason I'm telling you this is because you're the only one who can help them. I could but my heart was once pure but now it's frozen to both Love and Inner Beauty. You're the only one who can do it. If you don't… then those you love will remain shallow forever and they can never be themselves again." He told her silently.

"I'm… not sure. What if this doesn't work? How can I trust you and what you say? You could be working for Charming yourself trying to lure me into a trap." She said quietly. Snowgre looked at her with frosty eyes. "_Ever since that day at the beach, she's lost her confidence and inner strength as well as her faith in herself. But maybe I can help give it back to her. My cousin told me so much about her and her powerful spirit. It would be a shame if she's lost it forever."_ He thought as Fiona stared at him. "It will work. You can trust me. I'm family and your husband's cousin in law. You need to believe in yourself again. I know what happened at the beach on your anniversary. It hurts when people shred your confidence like that but if you want your husband and your friends back, you're going to let it return. I know you can do it. I have faith in you and I'm my cousin always does." He said to her as they walked into the forest. Fiona felt something building within her. But suddenly robbers confronted them. "Snowgre do something!" she said. "I can't. I used most of my power getting to Duloc." He told her as the robbers were tying him up.

Fiona looked on but something was bubbling within her heart. It was anger. "Leave him alone!" she yelled as she launched into a flying kick and began beating them up. Snowgre watched amazed. He saw a self assured smile on her face as she untied him. "That was amazing! How did that feel?" he told her. "It felt like I was myself again." She said to him. "See? I knew you could do it! Are you ready to kick butt and save the ones you love from shallowness?" he asked. "Yes I am!" she told him confidently as they kept walking onwards towards Far, Far Away. "_That's funny. It takes a hunter attack to give back what those jerks at the beach took away. But soon they along with Charming will see the true power of inner beauty. It takes more than appearance to be truly powerful."_ Fiona thought to herself.

Charming was furious. He knew that his spell hadn't affected Fiona's heart. He also knew that she'd be coming to break the spell and save those she cared about. He then got an idea as he saw her husband approach him. "I've got a little job for you." He said smiling evilly…


	5. Big Trouble and a Royal Ally

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 5

Fiona came back to the camp fire sad. She wished what had happened when she'd been getting firewood had been a dream but it wasn't. Her husband had ambushed her and tried to hurt her. She didn't want to hurt him because he wasn't himself but when he had scrabbed her, she had no choice but to fight. Tears fell down her face. "I'm sorry honey. When this is all over, I'll make it up to you." She thought as she sat beside Snowgre but it hurt looking at him. He noticed something wasn't right with her and he had to find out. He then got it out of Fiona later what had happened. He felt sorry for her. "Don't worry Fiona. It wasn't his fault. He's just under Charming's spell. He then came across his cousin's sleeping body.

He got an idea as his body glowed with magic. "What're you doing?" she asked worriedly. "I'm trying to break Charming's hold on him." He told her gently. He then closed his eyes and thought hard. Magic shot out of his furry hands and surrounded his cousin's body. "_This has to work for Fiona's sake! She feels sad about what happened. I don't want to see what happens to her if my plan doesn't work."_ He thought as the magic vanished. Fiona watched as her husband opened his brown eyes. "What happened? How did I get out here? The last thing I was doing was going into the house." He said as she hugged him tearfully. He didn't remember being under Charming's control.

Charming was about to explode when he saw this. "How were they able to break my hold on him?" he yelled angrily. "Chill man. We'll take care of them soon once they show up here." Snow told him. He laughed at that. "You're right! Soon I'll have her begging for mercy." He said as his wand glowed with magic. Shrek was confused by what Fiona told him about what Charming was doing but understood. "I'm sorry about what happened." he said to her as he looked away from her. "It wasn't your fault! You... were under Charming's control. He cast a spell on both Duloc and Far, Far Away making people vain and shallow like him. He wants it so that people like us feel bad of ourselves when we're perfect. Snow and the other princess girls are under it too." she told him. He smiled sadly at her. "How did you?" he asked her quietly.

"Break the spell. It was your cousin Snowgre who did it. He used powerful magic to break it but it wasn't easy. When we reach Charming's lair, we've got to do the same for everybody in both kingdoms, okay? It would be horrible if it didn't break. Our friends and family would be shallow forever and there would be nothing we could do!" she replied. Charming then sent an orb of magic into the forest that would erase both Shrek and Fiona's memories but it was disguised as a fruit so they wouldn't be wary of it. He cackled as they came near the tree it was in. "I'm hungry! I haven't had anything to eat since we left home!" Fiona said as she saw the nectarine in the tree and got it down. Snowgre felt bad vibes from it. He watched as Fiona and his cousin ate it. "Do you want some? It's really delicious!" Shrek asked him. "No thanks! I don't think it's safe to eat. I feel bad vibes from it." he told him. "Suit yourself." he said as he ate the last bit of it. But then both he and Fiona felt really weird. Their heads were dizzy and their stomachs were acting odd too.

Snowgre watched as both of them sat by the bottom of the tree. Their eyes were blood shot and wide as spoons. "Are you guys okay? You look terrible!" he said to them. "Everything's dancing. " Fiona told him as her eyes were getting heavy. This worried Snowgre greatly. "Don't go to sleep! Stay awake!" he yelled to the both of them but it was no use. They were asleep in each other's arms. Snowgre then saw Charming appear. "Ah! It worked better than I dreamed." he told him. "What did you do to them?" Snowgre growled angrily. "That nectarine they ate was really an magic orb that will erase their memories. Soon they'll forget why they in this forest and I will rule with my vain kingdom and there's you or your friends can do about it this time. I wouldn't fight me if I was you." he told him, his voice dripping with fake sweetness like his mother.

"Why wouldn't I?" Snowgre retorted angrily. Charming smiled at his anger. "Because I have somebody you care about Snowgre just like your pathetic cousin. Don't you get it?" he told him. Snowgre's mouth dropped in horror. "Snowflake? You wouldn't! She's not like you." he said worried. "I might spare her if ..." he said smiling at Snowgre's pain. "If what? I'll do anything to save her. She means everything to me!" he begged. "If you don't stop me and let me rule, I'll spare her. Agreed?" Charming replied.

Snowgre wasn't sure about this. He knew it wasn't right to leave those people under Charming's spell but he couldn't bear the thought of Snowflake hurt. He knew that if something like this happened to his cousin, he'd risk it to save Fiona. He sighed before speaking. "Alright you can rule. Just don't hurt her, okay?" he said quietly. "Good I knew you would come to an agreement about this." Charming cackled as he vanished. "What have I done?" Snowgre thought as he looked at his cousin and Fiona sleeping peacefully. Snowgre then sank to his knees and sobbed frosty tears of anger. He hoped he hadn't let his cousin down. He then saw somebody approach him in a cloak. "It'll be alright Snowg. I'm sure he'll understand. You did it to save your lady. I know I would do the same thing for Gwen." he told him. Snowgre then watched in shock as he realised who the stranger was. It was Artie! "But sire what are you doing out here? Shouldn't you be running the kingdom?" he asked him. Artie laughed at that sadly.

"I came here because a certain feline assasin told me about what's been messing up my kingdom and making my people into drones. I came here to help your cousin kick a certain prince's butt off my throne and into loserdom where he belongs! I know your cousin because he helped me become King. Fiona is my cousin but I haven't seen her in a long while before she got sent to that tower. Big mistake on Uncle Harold's part." he told him gently. He then saw Shrek and Fiona awake. "Hey guys! You don't look so good. Are you okay to fight?" he said to them but he saw fear in their eyes. "Do you know who we are?" they asked him worried. Artie then backed away a little. "What's up with them? It's they forgot who they are." he asked Snowgre. "It's Charming's fault. He used a spell to erase their memories but I don't know how to break it!" he told him.

"We're in a lot of trouble." Artie said as they walked into the forest further...


	6. Restoring His Memories

Being obese ain't easy 

Ch 6

Artie watched as Shrek and Fiona kept staring at him as he made a camp fire. Snowgre was still upset about choosing Snowflake over breaking the vanity spell that Charming had cast on both Duloc and Far, Far Away. Artie then sat beside him. "Don't worry man. I know how it feels to have a special lady." He told him.

"What do you mean?" he asked him. "After I left Worchester, that jerk Lancelot was bugging Gwen but Icouldn't do anything because I'm King of Far, Far Away." He told him. He then yawned and went over to the campfire where Shrek and Fiona were asleep and closed his eyes. Snowgre smiled sadly as he watched the tender scene.

"_Maybe if I bring back their memories, Shrek and Fiona could go back to being themselves and help me and Artie kick Charming's butt."_ He thought as he used gis magic to restore their memories. He watched as dawn broke and Artie woke up. " Hey man what's up?" he asked him calmly. "I'm okay. I tried to use magic to bring back Shrek and Fiona's memories but I'm not sure if it worked or not." He replied quietly.

He watched as they woke up a few hours later to the smell of eggs. "Morning guys!" Fiona greeted them but Artie saw a blank look in Shrek's eyes. "Hey whats his name. Is that eggs I smell? Mmm… fried eggs!" he said to them. " Oh man Snowg! Your spell only worked on Fiona. I'm sorry." He told him. Artie then watched as his friend scoffed down fried eggs. " Let me guess the spell didn't work on Shrek?" she said qyuetly so that Shrek wouldn't hear that.

"I've got to go take a dump in the lake." Shrek said as he walked off. Artie followed him. He watched as his friend stripped off and went into the lake. Artie followed suit and went into the lake. The water was warm. Bubbles were sprouting around them. "So the spell didn't work on you. Shrek I wish you could remember what's been going the last few days" he said casually. "What do you mean?" Shrek asked him confused. "Charming cast a spell on both Duloc and Far, Far Away making the people shallow and vain. We're on our way to stop him, remember?" he told him. "No not really." he replied. "You have to remember me Artie? If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have gotten out of that dump Worchester Academy and made me believe in myself so I could become King of Far, Far Away. What about Fiona. Don't you remember her?

If it wasn't for you she wouldn't have gotten out of the tower of found True Love with you by her side. Please tell me you remember!" he told him. Shrek then grabbed his head in agony and fell head first under water. "Oh man! This isn't good. I've got to go dpwn there and save him before he drowns and Fiona blames me!" he said as he went under himself and held his breath. He found his ogre friend' s foot tangled in sea weed and untied it. He then hauled him with him as he came up for air. He swam over to the shore. He watched as his friend laid there on the ground as he climbed out and got dressed. He hoped he didn't have to do mouth to mouth. If he did, Fiona wouldn't be happy with him. He was relieved as Shrek opened his eyes. "Hey Artie. What's going on?" he asked him confused as he got dressed. "Nothing much." he tolf him calmly as they walked back to join the others.

Fiona was relieved as her husband kissed her. "Hoq did you get your memories back?" she asked him curiously. "Artie and I were in the lake when I went under water. Artie saved me but while I zoned out, my memories came back to me and I remembered everything again even you my green skinned beauty." he told her gently. She smiled back at him. "I'm glad to hear that honey." she told him. Snowgre looked worried that Shrek had gotten his memory back. "What's wrong with him?" Shrek asked her. "I'll explain to him. Charming had to make him choose between the kingdom or Snowflake. He chose her over the kingdom. He thinks you're mad at him. I told him it was okay because it was for somebody he loved." Artie explained to him.

Shrek then came over to where Snowgre was sitting with his head in his furry hands. "Um... hey Snowgre. I heard about what happened to you. I'm not mad. I would do do the same if a brat like Charming gave me that kind of choice. I would choose Fiona in a heartbeat. But we have the element of sueprise. We can still break the spell and save both kingdoms." he told him calmly. "You're right! Let's do it!" Snowgre told him regaining hope. Fiona smiled at that bonding moment between the two cousins. Charming was extremely angry at that. "We'll see about that.ogre. You'll never be able to break my spell, no matter what you try!" he yelled loudly. He then saw Gwen walking through the forest and smiled evilly.

He then disappeared in a haze of magical energy. Gwen was surprised to see him standing in front of her. "Who're you?" she asked him worriedly. "Don't worry I'm a friend of Artie's. A group of ogres kidnapped him and are planning to attack my kingdom. Do you want to help me get him back?" he told her. "Yes I do." she answered in her usual drawl. He glowed with magical energy and it surrounded her. She then became shallow and a drone like everybody else. He cackled as they vanished...


	7. Confusion by Nightmares

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 7

Artie was having trouble sleeping. He had a bad feeling that somebody he loved was in danger. In his dream he, Shrek , Fiona and Snowgre were in Charming's lair about to kick his butt when he saw Charming grab somebody by the neck. It was Gwen. This made him sweat in fear. " You must choose to leave those ogre losers you call friends or Gwen will die." He told him.

Shrek saw the teen freak out and wanted to help but couldn't because a guard was holding a sword to his neck. Artie looked at him then at Gwen. "I'm sorry babe. They're friends but more like family to me." He said as he kicked the guard in the chest and watched as he fell to the floor in agony. He then heard Gwen scream as she fell to the ground and closed her eyes in eternal rest. Artie sobbed as he woke up.

"_It was just a dream! I hope it won't come true. That would be awful." _He thought sadly as dawn broke. But Snowgre noticed that Artie was worried and sat beside him. He could see fear in his eyes. "Artie is something bugging you? You look all tense like you're freaking out or something." he told him. Artie sighed. He wanted to tell his friend how he was feeling but he thought he wouldn't understand. "I'm fine, okay? Just drop it senor." he said softly looking away from him. "Yeah right Artie. Stop acting like my cousin and just tell me! Don't you trust me?" he told him. He then saw Shrek wake up and pull Snowgre away from the others and put his hand over his furry mouth. "Snowg the way you're doing it, he's not gpong to open up to you. Let me try. He trusts me well enough to tell anything that's bugging him, okay? I'm gonna take my hand away from your mouth." he told him sternly but quietly. Snowgre huffed as he watched him go over to Artie but hid behind a tree because Artie was talking to himself about what to do about his worrying about Gwen.

" I know it was just a terrible dream... but what if we get to Charming's lair and that happens. I won't let him kill Gwen but I can't let that vain blond haired maniac hurt my friends either. They're like my family. I'm so confused. What would my heart tell me?" he told himself. Shrek felt really sorry for the seventeen year old. Before he'd became King, his whole life had been a long stay in loserdom but then he found out he was the next in line for the throne and his life changed. But his ogre friend wondered if he was happier now he was King but he saw something veside Artie. It was a dagger. He then came over to him at once. Artie's left arm sleeve was cut and his arm was bleeding. "No... don't kill them or Gwen. I'll do anything." he whispered in his sleep. "Artie! Wake up. It's me Shrek your amigo." he said loudly shaking him while holding him in his arms. But to Artie lost in bad dreaming and was unaware that his friend was trying to help him thought it was Charming's voice and was struggling to get out of his friend's arms. "Let me go Charming! I won't let you hurt my friends or Gwen! They mean everything to me." he said angrily in his sleep.

Snowgre saw this and decided to wake up the teenager. An icy blast shot out of his fingers and hit Artie on the head. Shrek watched thankfully as Artie opened his eyes and dropped him gently onto the forest ground. "Hey guys what's... going on?" he said wiping the sleep from his eyes. He saw Shrek sitting beside him looking concerned. "Artie are you worried about someone... I mean you care about back at Worchester? It's just you were sort of talking in your sleep." he asked him gently. Artie looked really disturbed before he answered his friend's question. "Yes I am. Worried about Gwen and you guys." he told him. "What do you mean Artie?" Shrek asked gently. "Everytime I fall asleep, I keep having bad dreams. They start with us about to kick Charming's vain butt when suddenly without warning he holds Gwen by the neck. He tells me that I have to choose between you guys or her but I get so scared, I never decide. Then everything goes black and I'm in a grave yard standing near four grave stones abd they belong to you, Fiona , Snowgre and Gwen. After that Charming appears and kills me but I wake up after that afraid. I don't want to lose the things that make my world a better place." he said through tears.

Shrek was speechless taking this all in. He wanted to say something that would make the kid feel better but he didn't know exactly what to say as Artie clung to his arms and sobbed into his vest. "Hey it'll be okay man. I know what you're gonna decide if that happens. Besides Fiona and I will always be in your heart... even if the worst happens. I need you to promise me something. If Fiona and I do get slayed, I want you to look after the triplets for us okay?" he told him gently as he stroked his brownish hair. "I promise. You're the father I wished I had." he replied , his eyes getting heavy. "Are you sure it's okay to go to sleep? You might have another bad dream." Shrek asked softly but it was too late because Artie was asleep in his arms. He was tossing and turning slightly trying not to hurt his friend. "Don't worry Artie there's nothing to be afraid of. I'm right beside you." he whispered into the teen's ear. Artie was in his castle in Far Far Away when he hurt his friends scream for mercy. He ran through the corridors searching for them but he stopped when he saw Gwen. She had a sad look on her pale face. "I'm sorry Artie, so sorry." she said gently, her voice emotionless. "What do you mean? Where are my friends?" he asked her.

"Artie they're dead. They put up a brave fight but Charming killed them using powerful magic. I saw him do it. Fiona wanted me to give you this." she told him. It was her locket her husband and Artie's best friend had given her after they were married. "NO!" Artie screamed as he woke up crying in his friend's arms. Fiona had been woken up by that. "Let me guess another bad dream?" Shrek asked quietly. Artie nodded blinking back tears. "Yes and it was much worse than the last one. Why is this happening to me? I've never harmed anybody that I should be plagued by awful nightmares about my friends and only true Love dying in them!" he said angrily at the end of his rope. "Tell me what happened. If you don't, that's okay but the fear and sadness of all this will just engulf ya until you're nothing but a wreck. Trust me I know. After your uncle, my father in law died, I had many nightmares about Fiona dying but I got over it because I had hope that would never happem. If you hope for Gwen and do everything you can to protect her, then you'll be stronger and no amount of bad dreams can destroy it." he told him in his most soothing voice. Fiona saw the red rims around Artie's eyes and was worried.

But Charming was happy to see Artie distressed like this. "My plan is working. All I need to do is create more bad dreams and he'll be dead because he'll have killed himself trying to get rid of them!" he cackled as magic honed in on Artie's fear waiting for him to fall asleep. But both Shrek and Snowgre were worried for Artie. He was feeling very suicidal because of these dreams and had to help him before it was too late... Fiona was unaware of how much her cousin was hurting at the moment. But soon she would and would wish they could turn back time...


	8. Artie's Gone Forever

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 8

Artie was still suffering from bad dreams. He couldn't get the images of them out of his head. There was only thing to do. It was pretty bad but it was the only one way to stop the nightmares.

He then left a letter by the camp fire explaining why he had to do this. He took a lingering look at his three friends before running off to the lake. It was pretty deep. "Good. It'll do. Goodbye cruel world!" he said as he jumped into it and let himself sink. Memories flashed through his mind as he began to stop breathing amd his eyes closed forever in eternal rest. Shrek woke up the next morning having a bad feeling in his stomach. "Artie?" he said to himself quietly looking at where the teen had been sleeping fitfully. He was gone. He then found the note and opened it.

Guys 

I have to go. I never thought of doing this but there's no other way to stop the dreams from hurting me and then worrying you guys. I have but one request before I leave this world and those I love, that my best non human friend and confidant take the throne once that whole mess with Charming is done. I'm sorry but to me, this was the only way I could heal.

Artie.

It read. He couldn't believe this, that Artie had… no he wouldn't. Fiona then saw him run off into the forest in the direction of the lake hoping to find Artie not dead but sitting there waiting for him but as he got there, the stench of death hit his nostrils. This frightened him as he dove into the lake in his clothes and swam under water. He found Artie's body lying on the bottom of the lake bed. He carried him gently in his arms as he came up for air and came out of the lake onto the shore catching his breath. He then tried doing mouth to mouth but he could feel no heart beat. This worried him. A tear fell down his green cheek and hit the lifeless teen's jersey. Fiona then joined him. She saw Artie lying there lifeless and her husband upset and figured out what was wrong. "He died? But he can't! Now there's no point fighting Charming now that Artie's... gone." she said quietly.

"He is dead Fiona, okay? He commited suicide by drowning in the lake because of those damn dreams! I... should've helped him better but I didn't and now he's gone and everything's messed up! Don't touch me Fiona! Just... leave me alone. After all this mess with Charming is done, Artie will be buried at Far, Far Away in the royal garden next to Dad's burial pond." he said to her sadly, all the warmth gone from his eyes. He felt it was his fault but it wasn't. Fiona knew that. Snowgre then showed her the note Artie had left by the campfire. She then saw frosty tears well up in his eyes but bottled them up. "It's more harder for Shrek because of this. He and Artie... While they were coming back to Far, Far Away, they formed a very strong bond of some sorts but I don't know what kind." she said softly as she touched her cousin's blue lifeless skin. It wasn't fair that this happened to Artie but was more worried for her husband. She knew he didn't deal with things like this well and had a feeling that if she and Snowgre didn't take care of him during this delicate, they'd lose him forever. That was something she didn't want to happen. Snowgre felt the same way.

They watched as their friend picked up Artie's body and they walked back to where they'd made camp last night. Fiona then cooked eggs for them to eat but Shrek wasn't very hungry. "I'm sorry Fiona. I... just can't bring myself to eat anything after what happened eariler with Artie. "Okay then. But if you want to talk, we're here, okay? You don't have to go through this alone. We'll be with you." she told him as she kissed him. He nodded sadly. Charming watched as his enemy struggled against his emotions and laughed evilly. Ever since Charming found out that Fiona had married him, Charming and his mother had tried to break them up through trickery and a Love potion but Shrek along with his friends stopped them and took care of Charming's mother but they also found out King Harold's secret that he was actually a frog king. Charming was so angry after that and his life turned very sour that he had a sucky job at a dinner theatre, he vowed to rule the kingdom and went as far to launch an attack on the kingdom and even slay his enemy but it failed and he was a loser again. He then found his mother's wand and it still ad magic so he could cast the vanity spell. He had used magic to create the nightmares that destroyed every waking moment from Artie's own fears. Gwen was unaware of what Charming had done to Artie.

She heard him boasting about killing Artie and her heart felt like breaking because the spell only half affected her. "Are you okay sweetie? You look distressed about something. Is it that loser Artie I killed with his own naive fears?" he said to her. "N-No! I was thinking about someone else. Excuse me." she told him walking out of the room. She then walked into the room she was forced to call home. She lay on the bed and sobbed giving in to sadness. "Artie I'm sorry! I should've stopped him but I didn't and now... you're gone forever and can never come back!" she cried as her tears hit the sheets. Suddenly the window opened and the curtains were whipped in the wind as somebody walked in. "Gwen please don't cry." he said. She then got up at that. She was looking straight into Artie's eyes but they were see through like the rest of him. "I...I thought you were dead. How can you do that?" she said gasping. "Yes I died but I can come back here to the world of the living anytime I want so we can be together again. I also have others who miss me too. I love you with all my heart. I wished I told you that at Worchester before I left but I had a lot of stuff on my mind back then so I thought you wouldn't believe me." he explained gently as he tried holding her hand but it was see through so it went through her hand.

"Gwen are you in here?" somebody asked her as he came up the stairs. "Don't worry. I have to go now. If Charming tries to hurt you, I'll be there, okay?" Artie told her as he rose up and went through the ceiling. Gwen then was still looking at it as Charming came in through the door. "What's wrong muffin cake? You look like you saw a ghost." he said to her. "I'm fine." she answered. He then closed the door gently. Shrek couldn't sleep that night. He watched enviously as Fiona and Snowgre slept peacefully. He then got up and went for a walk into the forest. He then saw somebody walk out of the tree before him. "Artie? But how? You drowned." he said quietly as he smiled sadly at the ghost teen. "It's okay Shrek. I went to the spirit world. I know you haven't been yourself and not eating anything, not even fried eggs." he told him quietly as he looked into his friend's brown eyes. "You're right Artie. I feel like... it's my fault. We were friends and that night when you... decided to end your life, I could've stopped you and you wouldn't be see through and still King." he said to him. Artie sighed at his friend's words.

"It's not your fault and it never was. We became friends through a common hate for our fathers but we still are even though I'm not alive and in the spirit world. I'm with my Mom who died when I was just a baby and Uncle Harold. It'll get worse for a little while but it'll get better, trust me." he told him. He then heard Fiona calling his friend's name. "I've got to go now, okay but I'll come back, I promise when you least expect it." Artie said as he vanished from sight. Fiona then hugged her husband gently. "Who were you talking to before we showed up?" she asked him. "It was Artie. He came here from the spirit world." Shrek told her calmly. Both her and Snowgre shot him a look. "Artie you out here? Show your ghostly self!" Snowgre yelled. Fiona then elbowed him in the arm. "What was that for man? I was only kidding." he replied. She then turned to her husband. "Fiona don't you believe me?" he said sadly to her. "I'm not so sure honey. Maybe it was Artie or maybe... it was just your imagination trying to comfort you.

You've had so much stress lately that you're starting to see things." she told him quietly as she watched him follow them. He seemed so sad. Was it all in his head or did he really see Artie's ghost? He was so confused at the moment. Fiona watched worriedly as he refused another meal. "We have to help him. If we don't, he could end up like Artie and that's something I don't want to happen! I've lost and refound so many things that I don't want my husband to be one of the ones I lose." she told Snowgre quietly through tears. So many people he loved were hurting and it hurt to see them like this. He wished there was something he could do but he couldn't. Charming laughed as another plan formed in his vain mind. Gwen was hating Charming more and more and was missing Artie with every breath in her body...


	9. Calm before the Storm

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 9

Snowgre was worried. His cousin hadn't been the same after what happened to Artie. To him, it felt like it was all his fault. Fiona knew that Charming had planned this to happen so that her husband would be like this as they made camp that night. In her room in Charming's lair, Gwen was thinking, brooding deeply over Artie. "_I should've stopped Charming from sending Artie those terrible visions. That way he'd still be alive and come to help me when they show up to break the vanity spell. I never got to tell him the truth about my feelings for him… that I loved him at Worchester and wanted to befriend him when nobody else would._

_But the price of being popular was too high as it meant I couldn't be with him or it would make me look like a loser like Artie was. I wish I could go back in time and change what I did but it seems impossible. Even Professor Merlin couldn't do it and he's a powerful enchanter. I owe it to Artie to dissuade Charming from his insane plan to take over kingdoms and make others shallow and cruel. But hopefully Artie's friends can stop that vain prince before he does something nobody can fix."_ She thought as she lay on her bed with her head on the pillow. A small tear ran down her pale face as Artie's face popped into her mind. Meanwhile Fiona watched as her husband tossed and turned in his sleep. Snowgre then brought out a vial of potion from his coat. "What is it? A potion to help him sleep without guilt?" she asked curious. "No. It's a go back in time spell. If we use this to turn back time for a while to when Artie was about to go to the lake, Shrek could stop him and things would be fixed so that it wouldn't happen and Artie will still be here with us." He explained gently as he opened the lid of the vial and poured a circle of potion around the camp fire where they had been sitting. Suddenly it glowed and they vanished. They then found themselves back at the camp fire that night when Artie left them. "Wow! Now Shrek can save Artie's life." Fiona said as her husband opened his eyes.

"What's going on? I thought Artie died." He told them yawning. "Sort of. Snowgre used magic to turn back time so we could save him. You have to prevent him from going to the lake." Fiona explained calmly. He then smiled as Artie woke up. He then saw him walk off. Fiona watched as he followed his young friend. He hoped he could stop him before it was too late. "Please Artie don't do what I think you're going to do. You've so much to live for. Charming's sending you those dreams so he can get rid of you. Don't give into him Artie, we'll destroy his dreams forever. Plus if you die, who'll look after Far, Far Away? All those people will still be under that vanity spell forever." He told the teen as he looked into the lake's water. It looked cool and uncaring. He knew what Charming was doing wasn't right and he and his friends were the only ones who could put things right.

"You're right man. So much counts on us especially me. I can't turn my back on those who believe in me especially you. You gave me the strength and courage to become a ruler. I know Charming is a brat who needs to be stopped before everything is ruined especially our friendship." He replied as he walked away with Shrek back to the camp fire. Fiona was relieved when she saw them come back. "Let me guess you managed to save Artie." She said to Shrek. He nodded as they were surrounded by another flash of light as they vanished. "What happened?" Artie asked as they sat around the fire when they came back to the present night. "I can explain. Snowgre cast a spell so that we could go back in time to save you. Shrek was really freaking out about what nearly happened if you'd jumped into that lake." Fiona told him. Artie nodded confused. "What was I about to do?" he asked her worriedly. "You jumped into the lake and drowned." Snowgre replied. Artie shivered at his frosty friend's answer. "Since when can you do magic?" Shrek asked his cousin.

"I'm not really sure. Ever since I turned thirteen last year, I've been able to cast spells and mix together amazing potions like Merlin nearly. But I... had a reason for joining you guys on your quest. Charming's vanity spell did something bad to my parents." he answered with sadness written over his face. "What happened to them? Will they be okay?" Fiona asked him gently. "I-I'm not so sure. The spell is making them dying. The vanity spell affected them too so I was able to disenchant them but that's what'll happen to any ogre with magic if their loved ones break the vanity spell on them. I'm really scared guys. If we don't stop Charming, I'm gonna lose my only family forever and that would hurt me more than you would ever know." he explained sadly with frozen tears in his eyes. Fiona felt sorry for him as well as Artie but Shrek was worried for Snowgre. If they couldn't stop Charming, Snowgre's parents would die and everything they ever knew and cared about would be lost forever. He knew that his cousin had a frozen over heart but he'd be really worried if his cousin's parents did die. Snowgre would be so upset, he'd try to end his life like Artie had. "Don't worry Snowg we can do this! We've faced Charming before and beaten him so why should this time be different?" he reassured them. Snowgre smiled at that. "You're right! Charming is nothing but a vain brute in prince's clothing. Let's take him out." he replied, his eyes glowing with frozen fire.

Gwen then made up her mind and climbed out the window of her room. "Sorry Charming but I never loved you. My heart belongs to Artie and always will!" she thought as she landed on her feet on the ground. She then ran into the forest before Charming came and found out what she'd done. She hoped Artie would understand when she told him how she felt about him. She then heard Artie talking to his friends as they sat around the fire in the middle of the forest. "Can I tell you guys something?" he said to them. "Sure. Go ahead." Shrek told him. "Let's just say I have this friend and he used to be a loser and now he's become somebody, his heart pines for somebody back at his old school but she doesn't know because back there, she only saw him as a loser like everybody else. Do you think she really likes me or just playing me?" he explained to them. A smile crossed Snowgre's face. "I think Gwen does like you. She's just too shy to admit it. Besides back at Worchester, she had to hide herself because she rolled with the popular kids, right?" he said chuckling softly. Artie shook his head sheepishly. "Yes it's about me. I really like Gwen from the first time I saw her at Worchester but she never gave me a glance once Tiffany and all those loser jocks got to her. When I look in her eyes, I see somebody I wanna spend the rest of my life with, even make her my Queen." he admitted quietly. Gwen couldn't believe what she'd just heard. Artie felt the same about her.

"Hey Artie. What's up?" she said to him as she came out of her hiding place. Artie ran over to her and hugged her tightly. "I'm so glad you're safe! How did you get away from Charming?" he said to her, his eyes gleaming with happiness as he gazed into hers. "I escaped by climbing out the window. After all he's done, I decided not to roll with him. I should've... never decided to roll with Lancelot and the jocks at Worchester. They took me away from what I really want. I'm tired of having to hide who I am and rolling with fakers. When I saw you the first day of school, I wanted to go over and talk to you but Tiffany said it wouldn't be cool so I buried my true feelings for ya deep inside my heart waiting for a time when those losers weren't around. I wanna be with you my whole life too." she explained as they shared their first kiss.

Charming saw this and was furious. "That little wench! She'll pay along with her royal loser boyfriend and those ogres!" he yelled but calmed down when he saw an image of Lancelot and the jousting team at Worchester. "Yes they'll do. They'll help me take away everything Artie cares about!" he cackled as he vanished in a haze of magic. Things were about to get ugly...


	10. Revenge

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 10

Charming smiled as he appeared in Worchester Academy. Soon he'd get the very jocks who picked on Artie when he was a loser here to help him. Lancelot was seething with anger as he used one of the role playing kids as his new dummy. Since Artie had discovered he was royalty things had been going down hill in the social order on campus. All those geeks, losers and total misfits stood up to big hulking guys like him and his friends. It made him want to slice open a loser and show him his insides. "_I hate that Pendragon kid! Because of him, all those geeks and freaks aren't afraid of my jousting posse and me. Maybe I should go to Far, Far Away and get my revenge!"_ he thought angrily as he fell onto the ground.

Lancelot then stared as Charming approached him and his jock buddies. He was still wearing his red leotard. "Out of my way loser! I've got major anger!" he said as he pushed past him. "Let me guess you're angry at Artie? Because of him, you and your friends aren't the stars on campus, right?" Charming said and Lancelot stopped in his tracks. "How do you know that? We've never met before." He yelled worriedly.

"I know how you can get your revenge on that royal loser." Charming told him smiling evilly. "How can you? You're a dork in tights." He asked him. "I may be a dork to you but to me I'm a dork who has magic, enough to give you what you want. For Artie to suffer! All you have to do is help me take over the kingdoms of Duloc and Far, Far Away as well as Artie's friends. I also heard they took Guinevere your lady friend." He told him. "They have Gwen? They're going to wish they never did that!" Lancelot yelled in fury. "Good choice. Let's go!" Charming said as they vanished in a haze of magical energy. Meanwhile Fiona saw worry in Gwen's eyes. "What's wrong?" she asked her. "Nothing. It's… just I wish I hadn't gone with the popular crowd back at Worchester.

That way I wouldn't have been so mean to him when everybody was treating him like a loser and he really wanted me. Have you done anything like that? To almost lose somebody you truly love because of other people's views?" she told her sadly. "I have. When I first met Shrek, I thought he wasn't supposed to rescue me but as the day grew on, we bonded especially that night when I heard him talk about other people treating him like dirt but he was really nice. But the next night there was a little misunderstanding about my curse. He thought I was talking about him but I was talking about myself.

But we managed to fix things right before I made the most massive mistake of my life and becoming Queen of Duloc. I think Artie really forgives you. It's like he knew it wasn't your fault." Fiona answered calmly. But there was a bad feeling in her heart and Artie's. Lancelot always thought Gwen was his but she wasn't. She hoped that they could be stopped. Snowgre could feel that his parents were getting worse. "_I've got to go find Charming. That way if I can stop him, I can help my parents. But I can't tell Shrek or Fiona this because they wouldn't understand and try to stop me."_ He thought as he vanished. But Charming saw Gwen with Fiona and growled angrily. He had to deal with that red haired wench somehow. He then got an idea. He saw his mother's wand glow and send a spell into the forest where Gwen was sitting. Fiona was alarmed to see the teen surrounded by magic. When it vanished, Gwen didn't look the same.

Her face was covered in acne, there was dandruff in her hair. Her stomach was really big like Fiona's and her nails were really dirty. "What happened to me?" Gwen said as tears fell down her face. Fiona watched as the girl ran off into the forest. She felt sorry for her but angry at the person who'd done this to Gwen. Artie was worried at Fiona's words. "You mean a spell made her really weird looking. Where did she go?" he asked her worriedly. "She went into the forest. I think she's worried about you seeing her like what the spell did to her." she told him. He then went to find her.

He knew Charming had something to do with it. Gwen was sitting by a lake in a grove of oak trees. She sighed sadly as she looked at herself in the water. "Gwen where are you? It's me Artie. I want to talk to you." he yelled loudly. She then hid behind a large tree so he wouldn't see her. "Please go away Artie. You won't like me the way I am at the minute." she said as he came to the tree. He then saw her come out. He stared at her for a minute but smiled. "Aren't you going to make fun of me and how ugly I look?" Gwen asked through tears. He then saw her sit on the grass and sat beside her. "I don't think so. Magic did this to you but this isn't how you really look like. Normally you look hot. I'm sure Snowgre can break it on you and restore you to your normal self." he told her as he kissed her on the lips. But then he saw Shrek find them. He had a worried look in his brown eyes. "What's wrong?" Artie asked him. "It's Snowgre. He ran off to take care of Charming. Apparently his parents were getting worse. Stay here with Gwen and Fiona while I go find Snowgre." he told him as he ran off. Artie was worried for his friend. He had to help but he knew that if he did, Charming would take over the kingdoms and the vanity spell would be on the people forever.

Fiona saw sadness in Artie's eyes. "I wish we could go help Shrek but if we did, Charming would take over the kingdoms and I'd lose my throne. " he told her sadly. Snowgre hoped that he could do this but was worried in case his magic wasn't strong enough to beat him. Charming then had seen this in the magic wand. He smiled evilly. "Should I take care of him?" Lancelot asked him pumped up for a fight. "No stand down. I'll take care of him. I can use him to get to my enemy." he replied laughing. Snowgre then ran from him but he sent a blast of evil magic at him but he blocked it. "You hurt my friends, diss my cousin and generally being a spoiled brat. You're going down!" he yelled as his eyes glowed with eerie blue light as well as around his furry body. "Ice out!" he yelled as giant waves of ice washed over the lair. Charming was getting freaked. Shrek was impressed but freaked by his cousin at the moment.

He then jumped in after his cousun calmed down. Lancelot and his buddies had ran off in total fear. Charming then watched as Snowgre passed out. He was about to attack him when Shrek grabbed him. He was scared for Snowgre. Fiona then saw him come back hours later with Snowgre in his arms. "What happened to him?" she asked him worried. "He took care of Charming for a little while with his magic. I think he's just passed out." he told her. .He then saw him open his eyes. "Hey man are you okay? You scared me." Shrek said to him. The magic then faded from around Snowgre's body. "What's happening to you?" Artie asked worriedly. "My Ogreix is low. I used most of it stopping Charming." Snowgre told him. Shrek felt sorry and angry at the same time. He wished there was something he could do.

Suddenly fiery light glowed around his body and fire glowed in his brown eyes. He then put a hand on Snowgre's chest. He then felt stronger as his cousin's magic wash over his furry body. "Thanks man. Why did you help me?" Snowgre told him. "I did it because we're family and maybe because I don't wanna see you hurt or in pain." he explained quietly. Snowgre smiled at him. Fiona then saw Artie with Gwen. She was still under a spell. He wanted to help break it but didn't know how. Fiona then got an idea. "Maybe True Love can break it. Like with my curse." she said to him. "Like a kidd?" he asked her. "Yes. You can do it." she replied. He then kissed her. He felt weird but good. Gwen then felt better as the spell broke and she returned to normal. "Thanks Artie. I'm sorry you had to do that." she told him. Artie smiled full of confidence.

Charming was furious but got an idea. He created a monster that could suck confidence out of his foes. "You'll be perfect! Go take care of my foes. Soon they'll be nervous wrecks." he cackled as he set it out on the loose. "Is this really a good idea? Those ogres will help that royal brat to stop it." Snow White told him. He watched as she followed it into the forest. Fiona then saw Snow showed up. "Hey freak I see you're syill hanging out with these losers. Prepare to die!" she yelled as she excuted a karate move...


	11. The best daynight of His Life

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 11

Fiona was worried. They were on their way to Charming's lair when Snow had shown up and she wanted to fight her. Only she couldn't. She knew that it wasn't her friend's fault. It was the spell that was making her do this like everybody else. "I'm sorry Snow but I don't want to fight you." She told her. "Can't or Won't? You've grown soft since marrying your ugly prince. That's okay. Love always makes people weak. That way it's easier to hurt enemies." She cackled. Shrek saw anger in Fiona's eyes. He knew she wanted to fight but couldn't because Snow was one of their friends. Snowgre then woke up. He then saw two other women approach them while Fiona was busy trying to calm down Snow. They were dressed in biker chick gear and carried really sharp swords. Shrek gasped at them in worry. "What's wrong?" Artie asked him. "It's them! Donna and Charlotte. They're very sick assassins who get hired to hurt magical creatures. They're also big time bullies picking on anyone who doesn't look like their picture of perfection." He whispered nervously. "But if they're bullies, just take them down." He said to him.

"That's a bad idea Artie. They get mad really easy and start hurting with those swords. I don't want this to be my last day." He answered. He understood. "Look sister at that ogre! He seriously needs to go on a diet or a fad one. Look at his loser friends. No wonder why Charming was so worried about them. They're a bunch of losers." Donna said. "Yes sister. Let's have some fun!" Charlotte answered. They then unsheathed their swords. Shrek was nervous as they began to approach them. Artie then unsheathed his own sword. "What is he doing?" Snowgre said worried. "I'm going to take them on. Don't give me that look guys. We've faced things that are worse than these girls. We even kicked Charming's butt so why should two mean girls stop us?" he said confidently as they battled. But he lost his footing and landed on his back with his sword. "Let's get him!" Charlotte said as she and her sister cornered him. "_I'm so in trouble! I hope they don't do what I think they want to do."_ Artie thought worriedly when somebody pounced from a tree. It was Puss. "What're two senoritas like you trying to attack Artie for?" he said. But Artie watched as they bowed before him. "What's going on here?" he asked confused. "Because of you, we wanted to become hunters too. Why do you risk yourself to help losers like them?" Donna told him. Puss growled at her angrily.

"I risk my neck for them because they're my friends. Besides hunting down magical creatures is a waste of time. I gave up the trade long ago once I became amigos with Shrek." He yelled as he pointed his sword at the two of them. "What're you going to do to us?" Charlotte asked. "You're coming with us. You're going to help us defeat Charming and break the vanity spell." Puss told them. "No we're not! We're not giving up our twenty bags of gold to help your loser friends stop our boss so forget it!" they told him. But Shrek grabbed them and put him over his shoulders. "Let go!" they protested. "Nice try ladies but you're helping us or you might end up in a ditch or worse." He said.

Their weapons had been got rid of by Puss. Fiona then joined them. "Who're they?" she asked Artie. "They were hired by Charming to take care of us but now they're going to help us whether they like it or not." He told her. She had some bruises on her face. The two girls had gags over their mouths because they'd been yelling for help so both Shrek and Artie had shut them up. Charming had seen this and smiled. He knew his two new workers wouldn't betray him. Later that night Fiona seemed quiet, very quiet. "Are you okay? You haven't said a word all night." Artie asked her softly. There was doubt in her eyes. "It's just I know Snow can be mean but not like she was today when she confronted us like that. I did fight her but I... sort of kicked her in the chest and it seemed really sore especially when she walked off and I... saw tears in her eyes. I know she and the others are acting like that because of magic but what after the spell's lifted and she remembers what I did. She's gonna hate me for the rest of my days and influence the other princesses to shun me. Charming is hurting everything I care about. Normally I'm stronger than anything but recently I've been weak. What is it? Is it because of my husband that I'm weak or have I lost the will to fight?" she explained.

It hurt Artie to see his cousin this way. Charming may be trying to rule kingdoms but he was ruining friendships and relationships in the process. "I don't think Love has made you weak. It makes you stronger than any woman I've ever known. I'm sure she'll realise you were trying to help her even though you hurt her a little. Everything will be better once Charming's taken care of." he sighed sadly. "What's wrong?" Fiona asked him. "It's... just once all this mess is done with, I can go back to my throne right? But I'll have to choose a queen. All the females will be going insane for me but none of them are what I desire. But Gwen won't be accepted by the kingdom because she's not from a royal back ground. She's the only one. You understand right?" he told her quietly. She nodded in reply. "Maybe you should just tell her you want her to be your Queen. I'm sure she'll say yes." she told him. He smiled at that. "You're right. I'll do it right now! Thanks." he said running off. Gwen was by the lake. She was thinking about who she wanted to be with. Lancelot may be one of the jocks and popular but he lacked brains and the art of a decent talk without being about jousting but Artie did. He seemed like an outcast to the untrained eye but he was everything she'd been looking for and more. "Hey Gwen. I was looking for you." somebody said.

She turned around to see Artie standing there. He had roses in his hand and gave them to her. "Thanks. T-They're really nice." she said nervous. "I need to tell you something. I Arthur Pendragon want you Guinevere Squeeras to be my Queen and my wife. Once all this mess with Charming is sorted out, we'll get married in Far, Far Away. I promise you that." he told her. "I can't believe it! I'm going to be a ruler! I love you Artie." she said as they began to proclaim their love physically. Charming was angry but Lancelot was more furious at this. "I can't believe Gwen's making out with my lady! Oh he's so dead!" he yelled as he stormed out of the room. He was furious than ever. Gwen was supposed to be his. Artie then fell asleep in Gwen's arms. His shirt was off but he still had his trousers on. He couldn't believe Gwen was going to be his once they got to Far, Far Away...


	12. Family Issues

Being obese ain't Easy 

Ch 12

Lancelot was furious as he walked into the forest. Artie had really crossed the line by asking Gwen to marry him. "_He's so dead when I find him! Then I'll tear him limb from limb. His friends won't be able to help."_ He thought angrily as he walked through the trees. Artie and Gwen were in the lake swimming and playing. Gwen's laughter was music to his ears. Fiona smiled as she and Shrek waded into the lake. Artie was feeling relaxed until he heard somebody yell his name.

Shrek watched as Artie ducked under water. Gwen understood when she saw Lancelot standing there. "What're you doing here? You're going to ruin everything!" she yelled as she splashed him. "Why're you with Artie? He's the Mayor of Loser ville!" he said to her. "Because I love him and you're the loser! At least Artie cares about me in ways I understand. All you care about is dumb jousting!" Gwen yelled. Lancelot was reallt scared by her defiance. He then walked off in a huff. Artie came up to the surface but found Gwen gone. "She's upset. Lancelot showed up and upset her greatly because she loves you." Fiona told him. Artie understood and got dressed. "Where're you going?" Shrek asked him. "I'm going to find Gwen and calm her down. You know how it is." He told him. Shrek chuckled at that as Artie walked off. Gwen was sitting by the campfire beside Puss. He could tell she was upset. "What's wrong senorita? You seem upset." He said gently. "It's just those losers back at Worchester. They're always judging me whether I'm there or not. I really love Artie but they can't see that." She explained sadly. He understood. Donna and Charlotte had calmed down. They felt sorry for Gwen. "Don't worry sweetie. Those other kids at Worchester are going to get jobs kissing you and Artie's feet." Donna told her. Gwen smiled as Artie came to see her. "Are you okay?" he asked her. "Yeah. It's… just everybody back at school. If they knew we liked each other, they'd be mad. They don't understand." She told him. "I know how you feel. But it's not up to them, it's up to us." He told her as he kissed her. She then felt better. "_I feel sorry for her. She used to be popular and now it's hurting her more than ever. It was easy for me to leave Worchester without a care because I was a loser. She's going to need me more than ever."_ He thought as they went back to the lake and undressed. They waded into the water.

Shrek and Fiona had went back to the campfire. Snowgre was thinking about somebody he cared about at high school. Her name was Cheri. She was a cheer leader but she was human not an ogre like him. She had brown hair, slender bodied and really nice for a popular girl. But many popular boys were trying to make their move on her. "What's wrong?" Shrek asked him. "Nothing." the ogre teen said as he walked off from his cousin. Shrek was really worried for Snowgre. He'd been getting into trouble at school. He'd had parents but they were taken away from him a few days before turning thirteen. Because he had nowhere else to go, Snowgre had been sent to a foster family but they were humans. At first he thought it was cool until his powers emerged. Once that happened, his so called family were afraid of him. His foster father ignored and hated him. After taking so much hatred from them, he ran away to find Shrek because he was his only living relative but he and Fiona didn't know this but he was planning to tell them but Shrek knew what was going on and wanted to help the kid before it was too late, Snowgre was letting off steam as he shot beams of ice and snow at the trees. He wanted to tell him.

But he was worried in case they'd reject him too. He was wearing something aroundd his neck. It was a locket in the shape of an icicle. When he opened it, there was a picture of him and his parents together. It had been taken before they had passed away. A frozen tear fell down his face. "We need to talk." somebody said firmly. Snowgre turned around and saw Shrek beside him. He was looking at the teen's locket. "I see you found it again." he said gently to him. "It was in their room. It's the only thing left that reminds me of them and that I used to believe in the idea of family until they left. Now I don't. All they bring is pain." he told him coldly. It shocked the elder ogre to hear that. All the happiness seemed gone in his eyes and voice. He needed a home and a family again. In his head he was getting an idea but he wasn't sure if it would work. "What if you lived with me and Fiona and became part of my family?" he said to Snowgre. There seemed to be a flicker of hope in the teen's eyes at that. "What do you mean?" Snowgre asked smiling a little. "You could live with us. Fiona's pregnant and giving birth soon. I want... to help ya get a second chance at a family and life. I know you get into trouble at school and that you ran away from your foster family but they were jerks anyway. You need people like you. What do you say?" he explained to him. "I'd like to try again." Snowgre answered quietly. They then walked back to the campfire. Fiona wondered where they'd been. "It's okay. We were having some guy talk." Shrek said as Snowgre sat beside Artie.

Charming had heard Shrek and Snowgre's little talk and smiled evilly. He could use it against Snowgre later when he and his friends came to stop them. He knew something about Snowgre's parents that Snowgre didn't know. They were alive but were in his dungeon. "I can't wait until I see his face when he realises they're not dead!" he cackled as Lancelot returned. He knew he was still upset about Gwen. Later Snowgre was still up while everybody was asleep. He could hear his parents begging for mercy in his head. "I know they're dead but in my heart it's like they're not." he told himself as he looked at the night sky. Fiona felt sorry for him. Shrek had told her what was going on with the teenager. She understood when her husband told her his idea about giving his cousin a second chance. .


End file.
